


All My Fault

by Skyzzle



Category: Formula 1 RPF
Genre: Crying, Dealing with the aftermaths of Nico's retirement, Hurt, Just sadness I guess, M/M, Multi, Past Relationships, break-up
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-11-25
Updated: 2017-11-25
Packaged: 2019-02-06 19:26:43
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 430
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12824418
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Skyzzle/pseuds/Skyzzle
Summary: “Seb”, Lewis whispered, clutching at his chest as he folded in on himself. “My heart hurts. I think I broke it.”





	All My Fault

“Seb”, Lewis whispered, clutching at his chest as he folded in on himself. “My heart hurts. I think I broke it.”

 

“Do you think Nico would have wanted you to act like this?” Seb’s fists clenched to keep from shoving the Briton. “Because I don’t!”

“Don’t you  _ dare  _ tell me what he would have wanted-”

“-Why not? I loved him too!” Sebastian hissed and he dug his nails even harder into his palms.  _ "I loved him too" _ , softer. “And it hurts. It fucking hurts. He’s gone, he left us, and he took all the light out of the world with him, right?”

 

Lewis’s breath choked, teeth bared in snarl, eyes squeezing shut. “Don’t…”

 

“Feels like being flayed alive. Like you want to rip up the whole world for daring to keep going without him, right? For acting like he wasn’t everything.” 

Lewis crumbled. “I just want him back.”

 

In an instant the Sebastian was at his side, catching him. Steadying him.  

“I know. I know.” He fell to his knees too, cradling Lewis’ cheeks, struggling to catch his tears. “But not like this. You still have me.”

_ “I love him.  _ Seb, I love him.”

 

The German looked up at him, taking his hand away from his cheek.

 

“Clearly more than you ever cared for me!” 

“Does it have to be some kind of bloody competition?”  

 

Seb felt his heart clench and he slowly got away from Lewis.

 

“How can it not be? You picked him.  _ God _ , did it even cross your mind for a second to pick me?”

“It’s currently difficult to remember when you’re being such a prick!” 

Seb laughed then - a hollow sound.

 

“I’m the prick?”

The German continued to laugh and Lewis grimaced when he saw the pain on his face.

 

“You’re the prick! Look what you’ve done to me! You have no idea, do you?”, Seb almost spitted and felt the tears tickle at the corner of his eyes. “All you ever wanted was Nico, and I tried so hard to be like him, tried to  _ replace  _ him for you. But I’ll never be him, no?”

 

Seb bit his lip as he watched Lewis crying quietly. “I can never be him, and you’ll never be over him.”

 

With that, Seb stood up and wiped the tears of his face, turned around and walked out of the hotel room without looking back once.

 

And this time, Lewis was sure his heart was irreversibly broken, because he didn’t lose one, but two of the best things that could’ve ever happened to him.

And it all was his fault.

**Author's Note:**

> This just... popped out of my head. Really.  
> I dunno how to feel about this, is it any good? Is it sad? Did I do a good job? :D
> 
> Let me know please :x


End file.
